Today marks only 9 days remaining
until the birth of Amelia Grace.
Would there ever have been enough days with her
safely tucked inside?
I have begun to look at life,
in this new world I find myself in,
in list form.
My list categorizes day to day issues, feelings and events
into one of two columns
Things I know for sure
Things I don't know at all
It's a long list on both sides.
As you may have guessed
the things I don't know at all side
is a bit longer than the things I know for sure.
There are a few things on the list that haunt me.
My daughter will not live without me
but I don't know
how I will live without her
There is only one thing on the list
that offers any comfort...
Amelia will rest in the arms of Jesus
and though I don't know when my day will come
I will join her there someday.
If I am totally honest with myself
and with you
I will admit that some days
what I know and what I feel don't quite match up.
Today my mind knows
Jesus is enough.
my heart is screaming out
I just want my baby
she would be enough.
Day and night I have only tears for food, while my enemies continually taunt me, saying, “Where is this God of yours?” My heart is breaking as I remember how it used to be: I walked among the crowds of worshipers, leading a great procession to the house of God, singing for joy and giving thanks amid the sound of a great celebration! Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again-my Savior and my God!